Completely unrelated, but, if the incredibly hot blonde with the K Stewart eyes who came into my work the other day happens to stumble across this blog, here is my e-mail address: screamingsincerity@yahoo.com Let's make out? Awesome.

And back to business, 3 new celebrities for you today.

#7. Kathryn Prescott



Let me first start off by saying that I love this girl. No, really, I'm completely in love with her. Wait, she has a boyfriend? Well, that sends my whole 'meet, fall in love, get married, have five kids and live happily ever after' plan crashing and burning, doesn't it? Perhaps not. Kathryn Prescott, I'm dragging you out.

For those of you who don't know who Kat is (shame on you), here's a little insight. Kat stars as Emily Fitch on a show called 'Skins' which airs in Britain. It's like Degrassi, only maybe not as ridiculous, if you will. Kat's character, Emily, is a lesbian. She says it best herself: "I like sex with girls. I like their rosy lips, their hard nipples, bums, soft thighs. I like tits and fanny, you know?" I think that if I'm ever in a profession that requires a business card, I want that written under my name. But anyway, back to my wife. Now, I understand that it is Kathryn's character saying these things and not Kathryn herself...or is it? Let's take a look at what we're working with here. I'm saying this with complete confidence: Kathryn Prescott and her co-star Lily Loveless, who plays her on-screen girlfriend, Naomi, have fucked. They have engaged in lesbian sex with one another. Not dragging Lily out though, just Kat. She herself has said, "I'm not really into labels." in regards to her sexuality. Don't you go all Ashley Davies on me, Prescott. I want a straight, or rather, a gay answer so that we can get back on track with our whole 'meet, fall in love, get married, have five kids and live happily ever after' plan.







#8. Kevin Jonas



Beyonce once said, "If you liked it, then you shoulda put a ring on it." And honey, this boy put that ring on the wrong gender. Although not as popular as his brothers, Joe and Nick, Kevin Jonas has something to offer. He gets the privilege of being labeled the gay, or excuse me, the gayest of the bunch. His voice is a combination of Perez Hilton and possibly Ryan Seacrest. Jesus, that's enough gay to turn the whole world a shade of rainbow. And don't you wish you could've been a fly on the fall on his wedding night? I can't even imagine the sound of his high pitched (yet on key) scream when he saw a vagina for the first time. That's not the part you're looking to play with, JoBro! "Ohhh this is an S.O.S., Kevin Jonas likes gay sex." Hey, check it out, I got songwriting skills, too. Perchance I'm the lesbian Bonus Jonas.






#9. Katherine Moennig



If you're raising your eyebrows or rolling your eyes at this one, I can't say I blame you, but it's true. Kate, our beloved Shane McCutcheon, hasn't actually come out...yet. I know. I can't believe it either. Everyone wants to land themselves a Shane somewhere down the line. Bitch has got it all. My older sister Sam said it best, "Ever hear the phrase: 'If it looks like a pig, eats like a pig, walks like a pig, talks like a pig...it's a fucking pig'? Yeah, that's Kate Moennig." Couldn't have said it any better myself. The closet can be a lonely place, love. Let's drag you outta there.

Katherine's role choices haven't exactly portrayed her in a 'heterosexual light', if you will. Her breakout performance in 'Young Americans' had her messing around with gender roles, she played Drew Barrymore's 'friend' (as in close friend, like really close. The kind of friend who gets into bed naked with you and wraps their legs around you while you sleep. A.K.A. The best damn friend there is) in 'Everybody's Fine', a somewhat hard-ass androgynous doctor on the short lived 'Three Rivers', an artist with a SERIOUS mullet in 'Art School Confidential' (P.S. Girlfriend, NOT a good look for you.) and, of course, as every lesbian's dream. The one. The only. Shane McCutcheon on 'The L Word'. Ow Owwww. Hmm, seems to be a bit of a trend going on here, Kate. Care to elaborate? I guess this one is kind of a cheap shot, considering it's something that everyone with a pair of eyes knows. Kate, I'm sure you're hooking up with a bunch of us on the nightly anyway, but come on, enough is enough. Come out already so that I can relocate and desperately try to be one of those girls.