#10. Miley Cyrus




Now before you all start throwing hissy fits and telling me that I have no idea what I'm talking about, let's take some serious facts into consideration. Miley Cyrus starting working for Disney at a young age, she attempted to maintain her 'wholesome good Christian virgin girl' image, but let's face it, that's pretty much gone. And to think, I used to have so much respect for you, Miley.

Well, I used to have a lot of respect for another girl who's situation was very like that of Billy Ray's little girl. That girl goes by the name Lindsay Lohan. Droppin' names on ya now. That's right. Lindsay Lohan.

Now, I'm not saying that Miley is a straight up lesbian. BUT, if she continues down the path she's on, one very similar to Lindsay's, she's on a one-way track to alcohol, cocaine and Samantha Ronson. Don't believe me? Just you wait.




#11. Mandy Musgrave




Ladies and well, ladies, THIS lovely lady is no stranger to your sexual fantasies. Wait, that's not just me, right? Phew, that'd be embarrassing. Ladies, the woman, the myth, the legend...Ashley Davies. Er, I mean, Mandy Musgrave. My apologies, self-professed 'South of Nowhere' whore over here.

Mandy first appeared on the lesbian radar as the daughter of a rock star on the way too short lived 'South of Nowhere'. The, without a doubt, Romeo to Spencer's Juliet. Is it sad that my obsession with this show has gotten so ridiculous that I plan on naming my first daughter Spencer?

Sorry, where was I? Oh, that's right. Mandy Musgrave, I'm dragging you out.

Our Mandy Candy gave us Ashley Davies who gave us the whole 'I'm not into labels' way of avoiding discussing one's sexuality. And now EVERYONE uses that damn line. Ahem, OUT WITH IT, KATHRYN PRESCOTT!...Mandy Musgrave, lesbian trendsetter.

Mandy has had quite a few lesbian roles in her career to date. Besides Ashley Davies, she is playing the character of Misty in Angela Robinson's way too long awaited lesbian rock musical film, 'Girltrash: All Night Long', and she has also recently been seen on '90210' as Rumer Willis' character's ex-girlfriend. Say that one three times fast, I dare ya.

Mandy is a lady lover. She loves locking lips with the female members of the human race. How is she 'convincingly' covering it up, you ask? By being engaged to an individual I soon will also be dragging out. He's the dickhead from 'South of Nowhere', he is Matt Cohen.

If anyone finds out when and where this wedding is taking place, please shoot me an e-mail: screamingsincerity@yahoo.com When "Does anyone have reason why these two should not be wed?" is said, I'll come busting through the door 'Say Anything' style, holding a boombox over my head playing 'Come To My Window' by Melissa Etheridge. A few moments later, Lance Bass will come barging through in the same fashion, only playing Cher's 'Strong Enough'. And we'll both yell in unison, "I DO! THERE IS FAR TOO MUCH GAY GOING ON THIS WEDDING!" You and I both know you'd pay to see that.

But it doesn't have to get to that point, Mandy. Kick and scream all you want, sunshine, but, you've just been dragged out.




#12. Shiloh Jolie-Pitt





I'm going to get so much shit for this one...and I'm still typing, I can take it.

Once upon a time, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie engaged in heterosexual intercourse. They made a baby. Nine months later, she was born. They named her Shiloh, blah blah blah...

This Hollywood couple has given us our most famous D.I.T. (Dyke in Training) yet to date. But don't you worry, Shiloh, I'll give you ten or so years before I actually drag you out.

However, it looks like I may not have to. Shiloh reminds me a lot of myself when I was a kid. Well, red flag, ma and pop! Someday your little girl is going to be a running a blog about closeted celebrities! Ok, not really. Besides the whole having superstar parents who are wealthier than God and having siblings from all over the universe, Shiloh and I are similar. Shiloh may not even be gay...But, um, if the shoe fits...

Shiloh recently ditched her long blonde locks for a short 'I'm totally ready for Lilith Fair!' kinda 'do. She's often seen in hats, ties and pirate costumes. No, I understand not all lesbians dress like pirates, but there was this porn I saw once ...And now I'm talking about porn while outing a three year old. See y'all in Hell. And Shiloh, see ya at a pride parade in ten or fifteen years. The lesbian community is waiting to welcome you with open arms. And, uh, bring your mom.